Biography
Francis Almond was born in a state of distress in 1959, the son of the writer Morris Flyte. He was educated in Foxford, County Mayo, and graduated from West Lothian school of pet grooming, with First Class Honours in Non verbal education (HETAC). He wrote and published his first novel, ‘My eyes are fried eggs’ (1970), while working as an lavatory assistant at the Times Literary Supplement. The novel won a Chester G Wenge Award in 1971 and was followed by ‘The day I learnt to fart’ in 1974. He was Literary Editor of the The Buy & Sell between 1975 and 1977, publishing his third novel, Weetabix panty liners, in 1977.
Regarded by many leading critics as “the voice” and heartbeat of contemporary International fact based fiction, Almond is often grouped with the generation of County Leitrim-based novelists that emerged during the 1980s and included Francisco Cândido Xavier, John Bovril and V.S Naipaul. His work has been heavily influenced by television, especially the work of Kate Garraway, John Stapleton and James Van Praagh. A loose trilogy of novels set in the 18th century Flemish marshlands begins with ‘Luxury toilets: ‘A cry for help’ (1984), a blistering send up of Nelson Mandela, continues with ‘What the giffaffes saw’ (1989), and concludes with ‘The milky fart’ (1995), a tale of an unpleasant luncheon Almond had in the Hazel hotel circa. 1989. ‘That cat’s a bastard’ (1991), was shortlisted for the Mann Booker Prize for friction.
Other books include ‘Night shite’ (1997), a romantic who done it, an acclaimed volume of autobiography, ‘Fetch the priest’ (2000) – winner of the James Tait Black Memorial Prize – and ‘Warm cake’, a recipe book in the style of a coroners hearing (2002).
Almond is also the author of several collections of imagined conversations, including ‘Hitler fixed my top loader’ (1986), ‘Visiting Anne Frank and Other Excursions’ (1993), and ‘Stalin, it’s time for breakfast’ (2001), which includes fart jokes and several doodles. His two collections of short stories are ‘Sweet chewy nips’ (1987), and ‘A prayer at bedtime and another story’ (1998).
His latest books are ‘Mother never said you could’, a harrowing account of working in his mothers green grocers (2006), taking the form of a novella and two short stories, and ‘Have you seen me Bounty’(2008), a book of essays and short stories that focus on a homeless woman, in search of her eyeglasses.
He is a regular contributor to numerous newspapers, magazines and journals, including the Foxford Times, The Connacht ladies periodical, the Times Literary Supplement and the New York Times. He was awarded an honorary diploma in building studies by the technical college of Dundalk in 2000.
Francis Almonds mystic values are outlined in the extract below, taken from his acclaimed volume of autobiography, ‘Fetch the priest’ (2000).
“This belief was affirmed by an astonishing encounter that he had when he was only 8-years-old. The young boy was praying for God to reveal Himself to him, when an open hand appeared through the ceiling of Almonds’ room emitting radiant beams of light. Incredibly, he recounts, “I wasn’t scared. I actually got a horn.”
Francis Almond lives just outside London on a layby on the A312. He became Professor of Woodwork at Longford VEC, County Longford in 2007.
